Tonight Kate made some pudding. She asked me how much I wanted. I said, "however much you are having." She said "you don't want as much as I am having." I said that was fine.This was my portion. Notice how small it is. I'm not saying that Kate kept all the rest for herself (and the baby). I'm also not saying that she ate out of the mixing bowl. I'm not saying anything about her. I'm only talking about my portion of pudding. My small portion of pudding.
To be honest, I'm just glad to see her eat. From what I know of pregnancy, it must take a ton of energy and protein. As far as I'm concerned, the more she packs in, the better. In this case, she didn't actually eat all the rest. But she better.
In other news, we finished our hypnobirthing class. We got a little certificate and everything. Apparently, we are now qualified to give birth.
This is not very comforting to me. I mean, really, the standards in this country for qualifying couples to give birth are pretty low. Shouldn't there be an exam of some kind? Maybe a personality test? If cutting hair requires a license, shouldn't procreation have some basic training or regulation involved?
No, I suppose there shouldn't. Imagine if the government had a list of standards that each parent had to meet. It would be like federal regulations for education, only worse. No Parent Left Behind...
4 comments:
Ha! Then you'd end up with scores of parents with a million kids and they still have no clue how to take care of them.
...wait a minute...
I hope you took your meager portion and just walked away. I'm not saying there isn't a court of law that would convict Katrina if she killed you for complaining. I'm not saying pregnant hormones are stronger than homeless men on the subway. I'm not saying an embryo makes all men seem like selfish Playboys at times. I'm not saying anything. I just hope you enjoyed your pudding!
First of all, go Danika. Second, the Feds have come up with a list of parenting qualifications...it's called the crazy huge amount of paperwork required for ADOPTION!!! If every potential person thinking about having sex had to pass this insane list of "musts" 90% of the children in the world wouldn't be here because no one would qualify. But who needs to think about such things when there is pudding???
You people seem to think that I was upset at the size of my pudding portion. I was not. Like I said, I am glad to see Kate eating as much as she can--chubby babies are cuter than skinny ones. I'm just trying to be funny. On my end, I succeeded. Hopefully I succeeded on the other end as well.
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